jab, jab, cross, duck, right

successful day - was up bright and early, and then went to an hour and half of kickboxing, burning around 1800 calories, a one hour session of kickassana - most intense yoga there is. it's a combination of kickboxing and yoga. we didn't do any contact since we did kickboxing right before, but we did do shadow boxing - jab, jab, cross, duck, right. repeat repeat repeat. my arms were burning, the side of my body was burning. my body was saying stop, but my mind just kept saying 'push yourself harder, you can do this. harder. burn more calories. feel those muscles ache.' and so i kept on going until i could barely keep my arms up. we did an ab workout too, the pain felt good. kickassana burnt around 500 calories, possibly more, but we'll leave it at that. and then i walked for an hour which burnt around 200 calories. thats a total of -2500 calories. 
i ate three jellys today, two of ten calories and one of five, and some tuna and some tucs. that's a total of around 200 calories. 
so my net was -2300 calories. very happy with that :) 


i haven't written about 'life' in a while, but i just thought i'd say everything is going well. i met a guy on saturday afternoon and i gave him my number. but i haven't heard from him. i doubt i will hear from him, but we'll see. then this other guy i used to hook up with started talking to me again today. i miss him, not necessarily hooking up with him, but i miss him as a friend. for the rest, everything is good. i don't have much of a social life anymore since i spend so much time at the gym, and quite a lot of time sleeping now. all the exercise and the lack of food is making me sleepy. anyways, enough about my life chats, here's some thinspo

oh and thank you for the support guys! makes me happy to see that someone believes in me. i believe in you guys, and if you set your mind to it, you WILL get there. you just need to stay strong and have your mind in the right place. lots of love to all of you out there xoxox

whatever it takes

yesterday wasn't such a good day. i didn't do any kick boxing or yoga, but that's because the place where i do it doesn't have anything on fridays. i could have gone to the gym for a run, but my muscles were aching too much. instead i walked around for about an hour and a half, so i probably burnt around 250 calories which is really not enough at all. but hey, we all have bad days. 


today, however, has been a really good start. i haven't had breakfast, just not hungry, and am off for a walk, then walking to the gym and then going to do some leg exercises. i'm really working for that gap. i'll come back to my local gym, do some ab exercises since i really need to tone up my tummy, and then i'm going to walk to this fitness center that has a swimming pool to see how much it costs to join for the month. i really want to go swimming - if it's too expensive, which is probably will be, i'll just double on the working out. and once i move back to d, i'll have to swim in the sea. wow, that will be cold. 

hope you're all staying strong. thank you for the motivational comments. so much love to you all

good news, happy days

so yesterday after  2 hours of intense kickboxing [with next month's cover of men's health may i just add], we were stretching and our instructor was talking to us about what kind of foods to eat before we come to kickboxing to give us energy and because we'll burn them. well she said that because our sessions are so intense we burn between 1000-1500 calories. this fact made me SO happy. I've been thinking they're around 600 calories or the longer sessions are 900 calories. to think that i'm burning 1500 calories in one session makes me ecstatic.


there's no kickboxing today, but i'm going to go do some yoga. relax my muscles, stretch and breath. then my instructor said we'll do some lounges with weights to really work my legs. i hope all this working of my legs will give me a gap. i have a tiny, tiny, tiny gap, but it's nowhere near as good as it should be. 


i've reduced my breakfast intake to 100 calories. and ive decided to increase my daily intake to 500 rather than 400 since that's what i'm eating anyway. i'll obviously aim for around 400, but if i go over 400 i wont beat myself up, but rather will reward myself with something if eat less than 400 calories. especially with all the exercise i'm doing. 


anyways, a quick session at the gym and then a walk to yoga :) 
of course some thinspo to keep you all coming back for more too

love to all you beauties out there

i just keep going, nothing can stop me now

my yesterday was good apart from one glitch, but i worked it off. my today is going well :)


i went to the gym an burnt at least 600 calories. i burnt 300 at the start, then did the same workout routine as yesterday, and then burnt another 300. i know this adds up to more than 600, but i dont know how many calories each exercise burns, so i just say 'at least 600'. i walked around for about half an hour at a good pace enjoying the sun, which they say burns 100 calories. walked to the gym which takes 30 minutes so another 100 calories, and then back again which is another 100 calories. obviously, i didn't just walk there and back for no reason; i did an hour of yoga combined with kick boxing. they call it kickassan. i have never lost so much sweat in my life! yoga is intense, so to anybody out there who does it regularly, wow, props to you. i hope to keep it up! but that burnt around 500 calories. 
total calories burnt: 1400


but of course i ate; for breakfast i had a smaller portion of muesli and milk than i did the day before which came to 190 calories. for lunch i had some tuna at 65 calories, 2 tenderstem broccoli at 52 calories, two tucs at 48 calories. for dinner i had the same as yesterday but a little less so more like 90 calories for the chicken and 14 calories for the rocket. BUT then i went wrong and i had some milkybar buttons - at 165 calories. and to make things worse, i then had some jelly tots at 146 calories. SHIT SHIT SHIT. so my total was 770. i was upset about that, but it didn't show on the scales, and today i have worked hard. 


at the gym this morning i burnt at least 400 calories on the treadmill, then did the same exercise as previously mentioned, and a couple breathing exercises i learnt at yoga. i then went for a 30 minute walk which burnt around 80 calories (walked a little slower today). still have to walk to the gym, and back and do an hour and a half of kickboxing which will be around 1100 calories alone. so plus the 400 i will have burnt 1500 calories today. so far i've eaten some muesli for breakfast (190 cals), three tucs (72 cals), and half a banana (47.5 cals). i've had 309.5 calories so far, and i'm going to have some tuna, tenderstem broccoli and tucs for dinner in a bit. 


here's some thinspo

 love to my lovelies. stay strong

challenging myself

i'm back in L now and it feels so good to have control over what i'm eating and doing. woke up extra early, went to the store to buy some food - only the essentials of course. had 50g of muesli with two spoonfuls of skimmed milk (250cals), and then went to the gym for an hour and a half. burnt over 500 calories. in the afternoon i had half a can of tuna (50 cals), one tenderstem broccoli (26cals) and two tucs (48cals). then headed to another gym which takes me 30 minutes to walk to. burnt 65 calories. then did kickboxing for an hour and 15 minutes. burnt 600 calories. walked back home. burnt 65 calories. had some chicken (116 cals) and some rocket (14 cals).
total intake was: 504 calories [104 calories too much]
total burnt was: 1230 calories


eating wise, i ate 100 calories too much, so today i'll have less chicken or something. i do need to eat something though, because of the kickboxing i do. this evening i have kickboxing&yoga - should burn quite a few calories. i'll go to them gym in a couple of hours as well. i'll do the same routine i did yesterday:
20 minutes walking on the treadmill at 7.5 gradient 12% x 2
3 minutes on the rowing machine at level 7
6 reps of 10 on two arm machines (15kg)
6 reps of 10 on two leg machines (25kg)
10 reps of 10 crunches
10 reps of 10 leg crunches


i think if i keep this up, i'll be on my way, to being much smaller, healthy and on my way to perfection. i want to reduce my intake though, 504 is 104 calories too much, and thats my maximum. so i have to decrease my intake. 


i'm sorry for all the calories and gym talk. not my usual, but i just had to write it all down. 


some thinspo for you beauties. hope you're all working hard 

love,hugs,kisses.

if it was easy, we'd all do it

[i'm sorry i haven't written in ages, i've been staying with my grandparents and haven't been on my computer and they're wary about my weight so i haven't been able to get onto my blog]

i don't know what it is that's more addictive, the weight loss or more control. control to say no to everything, and to not pick at food when there's no one even looking. to know that every time i don't take that extra bite, i'll lose just a little bit more. 

it's been hard here with my grandparents. they eat three meals a day, and have tea. i can't not eat when i'm around them, so my weight hasn't budged which is annoying, but i know that as soon as i'm back in L i'll be losing fast. i wont be eating more than 400 cals a day, and i'll be doing lots of fitness. so i'll get there, i know i will. it's just a struggle, but that's whats so good about it. it means that not everyone can do it, that not everyone is successful. 

every day is a challenge, but it's worth it at the end of the end of every day. 

thinspo to keep you all as positive as i'm feeling right now

collar bones&hip bones xx

practice what you preach

these past couple of days have been good. i haven't eaten much - just one dinner and a salad the other day and i feel fine. i've been drinking litres and litres of water - it's what keeps me going. my parents leave to V this evening, which means i don't need to eat. and then i'm in L for a couple days, and i can finally go the gym again, and do kick boxing. miss it so much. the one problem is alcohol. i've been out several times here and i don't need to drink much to get drunk, but still, the calories in vodka are ridiculously high. and when i'm in london i'll be out drinking. my time in D will be an alcohol detox, but my whole family will be watching what i eat. i'm going to have to purge. i hate it, but i have to if i want to get anywhere. i also joined a gym in L where i'll be doing kick boxing, thai boxing, yoga and fitness. i'll be able to do it every day since i've finished college for the year now. so in may it's fitness time. i'm more motivated than ever. i just want to see the inches slip off, the gap widen and my tummy flatten. i'll get there, i know i will. it takes work, and effort, and lots of motivation. but i love this control i'm gaining over my body. i just hope that when i'm in D i don't give in and start eating normally, since then i'll have to re-train my tummy and my brain. does anyone else get that? the feeling that they have to train their brain? i just love hearing my tummy grumble and not giving in. 


here's some thinspo, beauties. hope everyone is doing well and you're all getting closer and closer to your goals. 

before and afters are so motivating.

love love love